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The girls didn\u2019t seem to notice \u2013 they\u2019d been overjoyed to have Lydia back at home with them and largely accepted Rayya as just another person living in the house. \u00a0Lydia had been somewhat uncomfortable with the idea of another adult woman living there, but she gracefully accepted the notion that Dardeh was now a thane in Falkreath Hold, and Rayya came with the position, just as she herself was attached to the Thaneship in Whiterun.<\/p>\n
It wasn\u2019t that Roggi mistrusted Dardeh, even though it had crossed his mind more than once that Dardeh finally had a woman who shared at least part of his racial heritage and who clearly wanted to share more than her sword arm with him. Dardeh said that he\u2019d made his preferences clear to Rayya, just as he had to Lydia. He would have his hands full, anyway, riding herd on the children, keeping the fireplaces stocked with wood, and dealing with any dragons that might appear while Roggi was away.<\/p>\n
I just want him with me. This is going to be hard enough as it is.<\/em><\/p>\n \u201cAbsolutely not, Roggi,\u201d Dardeh had said when the courier arrived with the letter from Frina.\u00a0 \u201cI will not make a further hypocrite of myself by standing up and wishing Ulfric well in his love life. Not after what he did to you.\u201d<\/p>\n Roggi had sighed, frustrated, wishing he had some way to explain how important this was to him.<\/p>\n \u201cIt\u2019s Frina, Dar,\u201d he\u2019d muttered. \u201cShe\u2019s family \u2013 or at least she was family.\u00a0 I feel obligated to go.\u201d\u00a0 But it\u2019s not just that, he had thought. I need to witness Ulfric\u2019s marriage.\u00a0 I need it as badly as Dardeh needs dragons.<\/p>\n And the worst of it is that I think Dar understands that, too, even though he would never come right out and say so.<\/em><\/p>\n Dardeh approached Roggi and shook his head.<\/p>\n \u201cI wish you\u2019d reconsider this. I\u2019m worried about you.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cDon\u2019t be, Dar. I\u2019ll admit that it would be easier if you were coming with me, but don\u2019t worry. Bryn and Sayma are there in Riften. I don\u2019t have my tools with me and I\u2019m not going to let him talk me into any side jobs. I\u2019m just going to go, watch the wedding, and come home. And if I don\u2019t get going I\u2019ll miss it.\u201d<\/p>\n Dardeh nodded.\u00a0 \u201cAlright. I\u2019ll see you in a few days. Be careful, Roggi. I don\u2019t want you to get hurt all over again.\u201d\u00a0 He leaned forward and gave Roggi a peck on the cheek, then turned back toward the fireplace, where both Lydia and Rayya were seated.<\/p>\n Roggi sighed. That\u2019s all he\u2019s been willing to give me in front of them, ever since we came back.\u00a0 I hope we\u2019re going to be alright.<\/em><\/p>\n He left the house, adjusting his sword to a more comfortable position as he squinted up at the cloudy sky.\u00a0 It was going to be a very long run to make it to Riften in time.<\/p>\n ___<\/p>\n Frina made her way into Riften\u2019s marketplace, not quite suppressing the grin from her face.\u00a0 She knew he was just behind her, and she knew that people must recognize him and wonder what he was doing there.<\/p>\n The deep brogue that had been calling out to the unwary regarding Falmerblood Elixir suddenly went quiet for a moment.\u00a0 Frina grinned a bit more broadly.<\/p>\n \u201cPsst! Lass! Over here!\u201d<\/p>\n She laughed and made her way to the stand where he was looking in amazement between her and Ulfric.\u00a0 Glancing behind her, she saw that Ulfric, while not actually smiling, had an amused look on his face.<\/p>\n \u201cHello, Brynjolf,\u201d she said, smiling at him. \u201cHow are you doing?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cI\u2019m just fine, lass,\u201d he said in a loud whisper. \u201cBut what\u2019s more important is how are you? And even more to the point, unless I have lost my faculties completely that\u2019s Ulfric Stormcloak over there.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cYes, it is,\u201d she snickered.<\/p>\n \u201cWhat is he doing here, lass?\u201d Brynjolf hissed urgently. \u201cAnd doesn\u2019t he know that it\u2019s dangerous for him, of all people, to be just\u2026 wandering <\/em>around out here in broad daylight?\u201d<\/p>\n Frina laughed. Brynjolf seemed genuinely concerned. What he didn\u2019t realize was that Jorlief, Galmar, and a fairly sizeable contingent of Ulfric\u2019s household guard were all making their way quietly around the edges of the city, keeping an eye out for any sort of threat.<\/p>\n \u201cIt\u2019s fine, Brynjolf,\u201d she said. \u201cWe\u2019ve come here because we\u2019re going to be married as soon as the clock changes the day. If you\u2019d like to come, you are most welcome.\u201d\u00a0 She frowned. \u201cI wrote to Dardeh and Roggi, but I haven\u2019t heard from them, so I don\u2019t know whether they\u2019ll be here or not.\u201d<\/p>\n Brynjolf smiled at her. \u201cCongratulations, lass.\u00a0 I think that under the circumstances of my particular employment it might be best if I stay clear. I have nothing personal against the Jarl, you understand, but\u2026\u201d He shook his head. \u201cBusiness. But I wish you the best, both of you. And now I understand why the lad showed up on my doorstep this morning.\u201d<\/p>\n Frina tilted her head to the side, confused. \u201cWhat?\u201d<\/p>\n Brynjolf smiled. \u201cRoggi. He\u2019s having a rest over in our old house across the way. Had a long trip to get here, he said, and was dead tired and covered with mud. I expect you\u2019ll see him when it\u2019s time for your ceremony.\u201d<\/p>\n Frina had to hold tight to herself to keep from bouncing. \u201cOh that\u2019s wonderful! Thank you so much for letting me know. That\u2019s\u2026\u201d\u00a0 Her eyes started welling up. \u201cThat\u2019s the best news.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cYes, well I think you\u2019d best see to your Jarl,\u201d Brynjolf said quietly, grinning and tilting his head in the direction of Ulfric. Ulfric was pacing back and forth in front of the smithy; the smith was staring at him with an expression that said \u201cI should know this man but I don\u2019t know why,\u201d and Frina realized that Brynjolf was wise to suggest they fade out of sight for a bit.<\/p>\n She went to Ulfric and took his hand, smiling at him. \u201cI think you should go find the inn for a little while,\u201d she told him. \u201cI have a few things to do to get ready and I want to surprise you.\u201d<\/p>\n Ulfric smiled back at her, the warmth of it lighting his eyes as well as his face.<\/p>\n \u201cVery well. Perhaps a short nap will be a good idea. I wouldn\u2019t want my advanced age to be an issue when it is time for the ceremony.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cYou\u2019re a foolish man, Ulfric Stormcloak,\u201d Frina murmured, then leaned forward and kissed him. \u201cAnd I love you. Don\u2019t be late to our wedding.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cI wouldn\u2019t dream of it, Stormblade.\u00a0 I value my hide, still, even after all the years I\u2019ve worn it.\u201d\u00a0 He grinned and made his way toward the inn.<\/p>\n Frina, on the other hand, made her way through Riften\u2019s graveyard to the shrine of Talos, and knelt before it in the fading sunlight.\u00a0 One of the local priestesses was at the shrine as well.\u00a0 They stayed there, quietly worshipping together, each lost in her own thoughts.<\/p>\n Talos guide me, as you always have.<\/em><\/p>\n ___<\/p>\n It was dark, nearly midnight, when Frina approached the Temple of Mara. \u00a0She took a deep breath and expelled it, then smiled and mounted the steps.<\/p>\n During the short time between Ulfric\u2019s proposal of marriage and their trip to Riften, Frina had located a seamstress in Windhelm.\u00a0 The two of them had worked together feverishly to make a dress unlike the type of formal garb one usually saw in Skyrim, not even at a wedding.\u00a0 This was red and cream, with dark stripes and a halter top that bared her pale shoulders and much of her chest. It was possibly the loveliest garment she\u2019d ever worn.\u00a0 She had a gold and ruby necklace \u2013 one of the spoils from her raid of the first bandit camp she\u2019d found in Skyrim, what felt like another lifetime ago \u2013 and it was the perfect finishing touch. She was particularly excited that she\u2019d been able to keep it a complete secret from Ulfric.\u00a0 He undoubtedly wouldn\u2019t have cared if she\u2019d married him in her scaled horn armor, but she was determined to give him something to remember.<\/p>\n If I\u2019m going to be the High King\u2019s consort one day I\u2019m going to look like a queen ought to look.\u00a0 And no cold Skyrim night air is going to bother Ice-Veins.<\/em><\/p>\n She stepped into the temple and glanced around.\u00a0 There were Jorlief, and Galmar, and several of the other guards stationed discreetly around the edges of the space. \u00a0She thought she saw a familiar blonde head seated in the front of the room, and for a moment contemplated going to Roggi, to thank him for coming.<\/p>\n \u201cStormblade,\u201d she heard from just behind her to the left.<\/p>\n She turned to find Ulfric seated in the last pew.\u00a0 When he saw her his eyes began to sparkle.\u00a0 He stood and took her hand.<\/p>\n \u201cYou are\u2026 exquisite,\u201d he murmured.\u00a0 \u201cI cannot quite believe my great good fortune to be taking such a lovely woman to wife.\u201d<\/p>\n Frina grinned at him.\u00a0 \u201cThank you, Ulfric.\u00a0 And I am equally fortunate.\u201d\u00a0 She leaned forward and whispered in his ear. \u201cThere is <\/em>a good reason aside from your position that your female subjects admire you, my love.\u201d\u00a0 She giggled. \u201cAnd probably some of the male subjects as well.\u201d<\/p>\n She thought that for just a moment Ulfric almost\u2026 winced.\u00a0 She decided that she must have just been imagining it, though, for he smiled and said \u201cLet us be married, shall we?\u201d and led her to the front of the room.<\/p>\n After that, it seemed to her as though the only people alive in Tamriel were Maramal the priest, Ulfric, and herself.\u00a0 Oh, she could certainly see Galmar in the front seat just beyond Ulfric, and she sensed that Roggi was behind her.\u00a0 But as Ulfric promised to join with her in love now and forever, and smiled with his face and his eyes, Frina\u2019s world narrowed to encompass only the two of them and the man who gave them matching rings and pronounced them to be wed.\u00a0 Ulfric gathered her up into his arms and kissed her gently, saying \u201cI can scarcely believe that I am married after such a long life. Now, my wife, we will need to move you into the palace where you belong.\u201d<\/p>\n Frina laughed. \u201cI suppose it\u2019s only right. I\u2019ve spent enough time there lately. Don\u2019t expect me to just stand around looking ornamental, though, Ulfric.\u201d<\/p>\n His eyes sparkled. \u201cBut you are so very ornamental, my Stormblade. It seems a shame to make you work.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cHa. Perhaps you can give me my own command. We do need to prepare, after all.\u201d<\/p>\n Ulfric laughed. \u201cWe\u2019ll consider that once you\u2019re settled.\u201d\u00a0 He inclined his head toward the seats. \u201cPerhaps you should go greet your guest. I suspect he came here for you, not for me.\u201d\u00a0 Ulfric released Frina and moved to where Galmar and Jorlief waited to hand him a mug of mead, clap him on the back and share their congratulations.<\/p>\n Frina smiled and turned to her left.\u00a0 She stopped stock-still for a moment, her mouth dropping open, an overwhelming feeling of d\u00e9j\u00e0 vu washing over her.<\/p>\n Roggi was in the front seat, dressed in plain clothing. If not for the fact that he was not carrying a pickaxe she might have thought herself a young child again, looking at her beloved brother resting after a day of work in Steamscorch Mine. But Roggi was staring at the floor, his hands on his legs. \u00a0She came back to herself slowly as she realized that he looked miserable.\u00a0 He looked as though he was in pain.<\/p>\n It has to be difficult to watch me being married when he and Briinda were not able to have their ceremony here. Oh my poor brother. What can I do? <\/em><\/p>\n She forced her face back into a smile and approached him.<\/p>\n \u201cRoggi. Thank you so much for coming. Aren\u2019t you going to congratulate me?\u201d<\/p>\n He cleared his throat and nodded, but didn\u2019t raise his head. \u201cCongratulations.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cOh come on, Roggi, you can do better than that, surely.\u201d<\/p>\n When he spoke, his voice was very constricted, as though he was holding back emotions he did not want to share.<\/p>\n \u201cI\u2019m happy for you, Frina. But this reminded me\u2026\u201d\u00a0 He sighed, and then managed a small smile. \u201cYou are so beautiful tonight. And you look so much like your sister.\u00a0 I\u2019m\u2026\u201d\u00a0 He looked up at her at last, his eyes deep pools of blue turned dark, and raised his hands in an air of frustration.\u00a0 \u201cI\u2019m sorry. This isn\u2019t about me. But I can\u2019t help but remember.\u201d<\/p>\n Frina slid onto the pew beside him and pulled him into an embrace for just a moment.\u00a0 His shoulders were warm, and muscular, and felt much like Ulfric\u2019s. The casual tunic Roggi wore was laced, but loosely, revealing a good expanse of his muscled chest. It hadn\u2019t ever occurred to her to compare the two of them before, but they were very much alike in many ways, both blonde and of powerful build.<\/p>\n I probably remind both of them of sad times in the past, every day. I wish I didn\u2019t.<\/em><\/p>\n \u201cI know, Roggi. It never really goes away completely. Not for me, either. I\u2019m really glad you were here, though. It meant so much to me.\u201d\u00a0 She grabbed for one of his hands and squeezed it.<\/p>\n He smiled wanly. \u201cYou know I\u2019ll always love Briinda. Always. And it will always sting that I never got to stand up there with her <\/em>the way we\u2019d planned. I felt like I died right along with her, that day, you know? But there is one good thing about this place.\u201d\u00a0 He closed his eyes for a moment and breathed deeply.<\/p>\n \u201cWhat\u2019s that?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cThis is where I married Dardeh. And that was the day I began truly living again.\u201d\u00a0 He opened his eyes and smiled at her, and she saw joy in them for just a moment before sadness flickered in around the edges again.<\/p>\n He patted her hand. \u201cDon\u2019t worry about me. I\u2019m fine.\u00a0 I just need to sit here and be quiet for a bit. I\u2019ll be alright. If you\u2019re happy, Frina, that\u2019s what counts.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cI am,\u201d she said.\u00a0 \u201cI can\u2019t remember being this happy since\u2026 since I was a little girl, and you were my big brother Roggi.\u201d\u00a0 She hugged him again.<\/p>\n He smiled, and nodded, but his brows came together in an expression of pain and he closed his eyes again.\u00a0 Frina thought she saw dampness creeping out from beneath his lashes.<\/p>\n She left him, then, and turned to see Ulfric smiling at her.<\/p>\n My husband.\u00a0 My king. <\/em><\/p>\n Frina moved to where he was standing and slipped one arm around his waist.<\/p>\n \u201cAre you happy, my lord?\u201d<\/p>\n Ulfric snorted. \u201cHow many times, Frina? My name is Ulfric.\u201d<\/p>\n She kissed him on the cheek.\u00a0 \u201cAll of the times, Ulfric. From now until the end of time.\u201d<\/p>\n __<\/p>\n \u201cRoggi.\u201d<\/p>\n The deep voice rumbled quietly over his head.\u00a0 He squeezed his eyelids tight shut and gritted his teeth, trying to ignore the man.<\/p>\n \u201cRoggi, I wanted to thank you for coming.\u201d<\/p>\n In what felt like another lifetime, those words would have made him happy. In that other lifetime he had wanted nothing more than to please this man who had looked into his soul and found the very worst instincts he had. This man, this supposed king, had awakened desires in him that ran counter to every standard of decent behavior and had shown him things about himself that he hadn\u2019t even imagined before. He\u2019d been willing to do anything at all for Ulfric. And it had cost him his marriage. No, of course Ulfric hadn\u2019t been responsible for Briinda\u2019s death. He\u2019d just been responsible for the death of what should have been. \u00a0Of what he, Roggi, should have been.<\/p>\n I recognize you by the sound of your movements, Ulfric. By your scent. Even with my eyes closed. That part of me that desired you more than any other person I\u2019d ever known still remembers. And now I\u2019ve had to debase myself, to help you win your war, and watch you marry Briinda\u2019s sister. I want to hurt you. I want to peel the flesh from your bones, slowly. I want to make you sing with the pain.<\/em><\/p>\n But I can\u2019t. I can\u2019t let myself do that. Because if I do, I lose everything. If I do, I lose myself all over again. And I can\u2019t do that to Dardeh.<\/em><\/p>\n \u201cI didn\u2019t come for you, Ulfric. I came for Frina, out of respect. Because of Briinda. For her memory.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cI know that. Nevertheless, my friend, I wish to thank you for being here. I know it wasn\u2019t easy for you.\u201d<\/p>\n Roggi opened his eyes and looked up into the face that once had been the center of his world. \u00a0It was so odd, he thought, that both Ulfric and Brynjolf had sparkling green eyes. One set belonged to a true friend. The other did not. He smiled.<\/p>\n \u201cI\u2019m not your friend, Ulfric. Don\u2019t ever mistake me for one.\u201d<\/p>\n Ulfric nodded slightly. \u201cI know, and I regret it. It should be otherwise. There are a great many things I wish had happened differently. But\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cBut what?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cIt still means a great deal to me that you are here. You acquitted yourself admirably through all of this.\u00a0 I didn\u2019t deserve your loyalty, nor Dardeh\u2019s.\u201d<\/p>\n Roggi smirked. \u201cNo, you didn\u2019t,\u201d he said quietly. \u201cAnd as far as Dardeh is concerned, I don\u2019t believe you had it. You\u2019ll notice he refused to come with me. He hated the war, and he hated having to back you, even though we all know you are the best hope we have to survive the Thalmor. He did what he did for the sake of Talos. And I did what I did for him.\u201d<\/p>\n Ulfric frowned.\u00a0 He lowered his voice and hissed.<\/p>\n \u201cDamn it, Roggi, can you not recognize when someone is trying to apologize?\u201d<\/p>\n Well, well.<\/em><\/p>\n He considered Ulfric\u2019s expression for a moment.\u00a0 He saw the intensity of the gaze, heard the barely-disguised emotion in the voice; and he was surprised. Ulfric was being entirely honest with him. It was important to Ulfric that he accept this apology.\u00a0 Roggi was truly surprised. And pleased. He thought he saw something else in Ulfric\u2019s gaze, too, something that might explain this unexpected gesture on his part.<\/p>\n He leaned back against the pew and crossed his arms.<\/p>\n I\u2019ll be damned for eternity for this, but I don\u2019t care.<\/em><\/p>\n \u201cUlfric, I need to say something to you.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cYes?\u201d<\/p>\n Roggi spoke as quietly as possible. He kept smiling, so as not to attract attention.<\/p>\n \u201cBeing with you nearly killed me. And you know that I enjoyed it anyway even though I didn\u2019t want to. You know that, don\u2019t you.\u201d<\/p>\n Ulfric smirked, and Roggi saw a spark of something dancing in his eyes, an excitement that could not be hidden. There it is.<\/em> Dardeh was right about him. He still wants me, and I\u2019m not even sure he recognizes it for what it is. I\u2019m surprised. I thought I knew him so much better than Dardeh does.<\/em><\/p>\n Even on your wedding day, Ulfric. How vile.<\/em><\/p>\n \u201cYes,\u201d Ulfric murmured. \u201cYou finally realized who you were. I knew it all along.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cWell.\u00a0 Be that as it may, I have only one thing to say to you.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cAnd that is?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cTo Oblivion with you, Ulfric Stormcloak. And to Oblivion with your apologies.\u201d<\/p>\n He rose slowly and stood not more than a breath away from Ulfric\u2019s face.\u00a0 He smiled, and knew it was an unpleasant smile.<\/p>\n \u201cI remember things about you, Ulfric,\u201d he murmured, in that tone he\u2019d used to speak to the assassin on the hillside in the Rift, and to Galathil, the Face Sculptor; a tone he\u2019d used to ask Dagnell if they should consider finding a way to keep warm, one night in Nilheim. It was low, soothing, almost a purr. \u201cI haven\u2019t forgotten\u2026 what you enjoy and what you don\u2019t. I will never forget. I\u2019m quite certain I could still make you whimper and like it, and I know<\/em> that I could make you hurt. And the best part of that<\/em> is that you\u2019re the one who taught me how to do it.\u201d\u00a0 He watched the expression on Ulfric\u2019s face, the effort he was putting into not revealing his reactions, and wanted to laugh because he knew the depths of Ulfric\u2019s fear where torture was concerned.<\/p>\n \u201cBut don\u2019t worry, Ulfric. I never will. I don\u2019t need to hurt people any more. Just\u2026 don\u2019t forget how well and how easily I can. And if you do anything to hurt Frina, anything at all, I\u2019ll be here to remind you.\u201d<\/p>\n He reached up and laid one hand on Ulfric\u2019s shoulder, a gesture that would look like a friendly pat to anyone else in the room.\u00a0 And then he squeezed. Roggi\u2019s grip \u2013 the one he had developed through years of swinging a pickaxe, the same grip that could bring a greatsword down through a body as easily as most men could slice bread – was massively strong. He could inflict a great deal of pain with very little effort. \u00a0It was one of the reasons they\u2019d chosen him to be trained as a torturer. Ulfric\u2019s expression changed to barely concealed panic as the pressure increased, and he gasped.<\/p>\n Roggi let go, and smiled warmly.<\/p>\n \u201cI\u2019ll be seeing you, Jarl Ulfric,\u201d he said loudly in a falsely cheerful voice. \u201cCongratulations on your wedding. I\u2019m so happy for both of you.\u201d<\/p>\n He walked down the familiar aisle of the Temple of Mara, to where Frina was speaking with Galmar, and tapped her on the arm.<\/p>\n \u201cI need to go now, Frina,\u201d he said as she turned to him with a face radiating joy.\u00a0 \u201cGive me a hug.\u201d\u00a0 She did so.<\/p>\n \u201cTake good care of each other,\u201d he told her. \u201cYou know where to find me. I\u2019m not likely to come visiting.\u201d<\/p>\n Frina frowned. \u201cI don\u2019t know what it is you have against Ulfric, Roggi, but he\u2019s my husband now.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cYes, yes he is, and one of these days he\u2019ll be High King and you\u2019ll be the royal consort and I for one will rest easier knowing that you\u2019re beside him. That said, even though you know how much I like to tell a good story he\u2019s far better situated to explain to you what transpired between us than I am.\u201d<\/p>\n He smiled, then, a genuine smile, because Frina didn\u2019t deserve to be hurt the way she would be if Ulfric ever confessed. \u201cDon\u2019t worry about it, Frina. I\u2019ll still support him when I need to. I know how important that is. Most of all, I want you to be happy.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cI am, Roggi. I\u2019m so happy. I just wish Briinda could have been here.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cYes, well. Something tells me that she was, in a way. Take care of yourself. I need to get back to Dar and the girls.\u201d<\/p>\n Roggi Knot-Beard left the Temple of Mara, whistling, feeling lighter than he had in years.<\/p>\n I probably shouldn\u2019t have planted that seed. Eventually she\u2019s going to wheedle it out of him. Maybe it won\u2019t matter to her. She has gotten used to me being married to Dar, after all.<\/em><\/p>\n He really still wants me, after all this time. Who would have imagined it. I guess being with Dar has kept me young.<\/em><\/p>\n He looked up at the moons working their way toward the horizon and broke out into a huge grin.<\/p>\n Or maybe I\u2019m just that good. <\/em><\/p>\n He laughed out loud at himself.<\/p>\n You are not a nice man, Roggi Knot-Beard.<\/em><\/p>\n \u201cDar. I have to leave.\u201d Roggi didn\u2019t want to leave without Dardeh. Especially given the fact that Rayya was still looking at him as though she wanted to devour him. The girls didn\u2019t seem to notice \u2013 they\u2019d been overjoyed to have Lydia back at home with them and largely accepted Rayya as just another … <\/p>\n![\"\"](\"https:\/\/baakay.com\/FanFic\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/10\/4-3-8-4.png\")
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