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<\/p>\nHe rose out of the bath and dried himself off, walking nude through the warm basement of his home to the bedroom, where he had left his leathers on the bed.<\/p>\n
And frowned.<\/p>\n
There had been a time when just walking from the bath to the bedroom like that would have resulted in his spending at least another hour in the bedroom, and he missed that more than he could say. He missed her teasing him, her laughter, the frankly greedy way she had regarded him any time he was near enough for her to start undoing those same leathers.\u00a0 He missed the excitement that would start dancing in her eyes when he or Delvin or Vex would come to her with a particularly juicy heist possibility. He missed her fire, her temper, and the way the two of them fit together as if they\u2019d been cast in the same mold.\u00a0 He even missed fighting with her when they had a disagreement.<\/p>\n
He missed being called Red.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
And he was angry, angry beyond belief that he missed her at all, after what she\u2019d done.<\/p>\n
\u201cI can\u2019t do it any more,\u201d he murmured as he slid into his armor.<\/p>\n
I can\u2019t stand trying to sleep in this bed.\u00a0 Alone.\u00a0 No, that\u2019s not right. I <\/em>can\u2019t sleep in this bed alone, at all. I\u2019ve been trying, for \u2026 how long now? Months. I can\u2019t bring myself to find anyone else to help me warm it up, either.\u00a0 Not interested. Not interested in much, if the truth be told. <\/em><\/p>\n If I don\u2019t get some sleep soon I\u2019ll be no use to anyone.<\/em><\/p>\n He shook his head.<\/p>\n That\u2019s exactly what <\/em>he told me. <\/em><\/p>\n If not for Roggi I\u2019d be dead by now. Those were some dark days. What a sick joke it is for life to be playing on the two of us.\u00a0 Poor lad hurts just as much as I do, I know it. He\u2019s missing her and feeling guilty besides. <\/em><\/p>\n He combed through his hair with his fingers and walked over to open the strongbox sitting beside their desk. In it were a heavy amulet and a ring, Dagnell\u2019s Bond of Matrimony.\u00a0 He lifted the amulet out and stared at it.<\/p>\n They had been dark days.\u00a0 He remembered them all too vividly, even though he\u2019d done everything in his power to blot them out.\u00a0 The very worst had been that morning, waking up late to a throbbing headache and realizing there\u2019d been more than mead in that flagon.\u00a0 Then there was the awful, gut-wrenching sick feeling, followed by panic and then rage, when he found the Amulet and the ring on the table, upstairs.<\/p>\n He remembered it, every painful moment of it, the pain that had begun like being stabbed through the chest and had since become a pain he couldn\u2019t rest from because it stung him at irregular intervals.<\/p>\n Why? That\u2019s what I don\u2019t understand.\u00a0 We love each other. Don\u2019t we? <\/em><\/p>\n It wasn\u2019t just the outrageous sex. He knew that part was good, and he knew she would agree; no woman he\u2019d ever met could pretend that well. He\u2019d never expected to have anything like it again at his age. It had been more than that, for him at least.\u00a0 He\u2019d been\u2026 happy.\u00a0 They went together. They fit. He\u2019d known that long before they ever had their first embrace, much less anything else. He\u2019d never expected to have anything like that<\/em> in his life, either, and it was strong and true and something that had been worth waiting for.<\/p>\n And then she was gone and he couldn\u2019t imagine why.\u00a0 It wasn\u2019t the disagreement over Maven.\u00a0 Maven\u2026 wasn\u2019t really a disagreement, only a difference of opinion on how soon anything could be done, if it could be done at all. \u00a0And they\u2019d worked through her unreasonable anger about skooma. They were bonded through the Guild, they were bonded through being Nightingales, and they were bonded to each other through a promise before Mara. And then she was gone.<\/p>\n I still can\u2019t figure it out. I hate it when I can\u2019t figure things out. <\/em><\/p>\n He knew she felt guilty about Roggi.\u00a0 He\u2019d always known Roggi was going to be an issue.\u00a0 He\u2019d known what a powerful pull there was between the two of them.\u00a0 He\u2019d hoped, maybe, that they could overcome it but they were human, after all.\u00a0 He didn\u2019t blame either one of them, he was simply\u2026 disappointed.<\/p>\n After the life I\u2019ve lived, who am I to say anything about that. That wasn\u2019t a good enough reason for her to go. I didn\u2019t want her to go because of it. We promised forever, the two of us, and I would give her forever, still, if she would just come back. <\/em><\/p>\n I still love the lass. I always will. And I hate that.<\/em><\/p>\n He sighed and looked around the room, then stood in the doorway and leaned his forehead against the wooden frame.<\/p>\n Come back to me, Dag. That\u2019s all I want. It\u2019s no kind of life without you here, not any more.<\/em><\/p>\n He\u2019d tried his best to end that life, the slow way.\u00a0 At first it felt better to be continually drunk and then it didn\u2019t.\u00a0 He couldn\u2019t do his job, he couldn\u2019t eat, he couldn\u2019t sleep; all he could do was sit and ruminate over the unfair things that had happened, and drink more in despair at the situation and disgust at himself for the way he was failing to handle things.\u00a0 All he could think of was trying to make the pain stop.\u00a0 It didn\u2019t matter what the Guild was doing, it didn\u2019t matter what anyone else thought of him; all he wanted was for the pain to go away.\u00a0 Delvin would try to talk to him.\u00a0 At first he would bellow at him and send him away but eventually he would just sit, not quite hearing, and ignore. And he\u2019d gotten so sick, so weak, and in the back of his mind was a voice telling him just keep it up and soon it will be over.<\/p>\n I think I lost my mind.<\/em><\/p>\n And then Roggi had come, letting himself in the front door.<\/p>\n Roggi had stayed with him for a good long while, helping him pull himself back together.<\/p>\n Lad\u2019s a good cook. I\u2019d be skinny as a fence post if not for him because I wasn\u2019t about to feed myself.\u00a0 Wish I could have talked him into joining us in the Guild. He\u2019s damned good with a lockpick and we can always use a good infiltrator.<\/em><\/p>\n He smiled to himself remembering the day had had learned that about Roggi. He\u2019d picked that moment to start walking in the sun, to get his muscles moving again, and hadn\u2019t noticed that Roggi was out as well.\u00a0 He had made his slightly wobbly return from a lap around the city just in time to see Roggi drop into a crouch and go to work on the door\u2019s lock.\u00a0 It took only a second or two before he was inside. Roggi had locked himself out, and then he\u2019d let himself back in.<\/p>\n That was something to see. That\u2019s a good lock, one of the best. Has to be, in a place like this.<\/em><\/p>\n He\u2019d followed Roggi in and offered him a spot in the Guild right then and there.\u00a0 \u201cYou\u2019re really good, lad.\u00a0 We need people like you in our outfit.\u201d<\/p>\n And Roggi had laughed at him, all in good humor, his blue eyes twinkling in amusement.<\/p>\n \u201cSo it\u2019s your outfit again, eh?\u00a0 That\u2019s good to hear, Brynjolf.\u00a0 But no, I won\u2019t join you. I appreciate the vote of confidence, but no.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cThat\u2019s a shame. Where\u2019d you learn to do that so well?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cEh.\u00a0 Ulfric\u2019s outfit.\u201d\u00a0 He had grinned, and shrugged, and they\u2019d talked about it a bit but not in any great detail.\u00a0 Then Roggi had made him eat again, and take a wooden sword, and follow him out onto the back deck to practice sparring for a bit. And they never talked about her.<\/p>\n Roggi had gotten him back into shape again.\u00a0 He\u2019d almost bullied Brynjolf into eating, had made him exercise his mind and his body, and hadn\u2019t let him lapse back into drinking even once. Roggi had abstained as well, even though Brynjolf caught him sniffing the air wistfully a couple of times as they walked past Black-Briar Meadery. \u00a0It was good for him, too, he\u2019d said; and Brynjolf knew enough about Roggi to know that was the truth. Besides, Roggi told him, he\u2019d been injured not all that long before coming to Riften and he was still getting back into shape, himself; the two of them were not youngsters any more and they needed to work at it. \u00a0That\u2019s how it had gone, until he\u2019d felt strong again, able to hold his head up and walk into the Cistern even though people stared at him when they thought he wasn\u2019t looking, trying to tell whether he was whole or was going to fall apart on them again.<\/p>\n He\u2019d taken Roggi down to the Cistern and introduced him to everyone he hadn\u2019t met already, as though Roggi was an unofficial Guild associate like Vekel or the shopkeepers outside the Flagon.\u00a0 Nobody there had ever questioned him when he brought a person into the Guild, except to tease, and they didn\u2019t then, either. He\u2019d started getting a feel for the state of jobs currently underway, although Delvin and Vex and Karliah had kept things well under control in his absence and he didn\u2019t feel especially necessary.\u00a0 He\u2019d even gone to see Maven Black-Briar, who hadn\u2019t bitten his head off but had, rather, seemed pleased that he was doing better.<\/p>\n If I didn\u2019t know better I\u2019d almost think she cared about me.<\/em>\u00a0 People had given him a hard time about Maven for years, but it had never been like that.\u00a0 She liked him well enough, that was clear; but to her he was primarily a tool to be employed to its fullest.\u00a0 And that\u2019s fine, because that\u2019s what she is to me, as well. A means to a great deal of money.<\/em><\/p>\n He and Roggi had enjoyed each other\u2019s company.\u00a0 But they\u2019d never once talked about Dag after that first awful night, when he had cried on Roggi\u2019s shoulder through the haze of drink and exhaustion and illness, as if there\u2019d been no end to the tears.<\/p>\n Then Roggi had gone home, and the house was empty again, and it was lonely.<\/p>\n He looked around again, then down at the amulet in his hand, and nodded.<\/p>\n \u201cWell, damn.\u00a0 I guess it\u2019s time.\u201d<\/p>\n He slipped the Amulet of Articulation around his neck, scooped the ring out of the strongbox and into a pocket, and then found a crate and started tossing things into it.<\/p>\n ——–<\/p>\n Karliah was there when he maneuvered himself down the ladder into the Cistern and dropped the crate onto the bed he\u2019d slept in for years.\u00a0 She was in her Nightingale armor, as usual, but had removed the headgear, and he saw her eyebrow rise when she spied him.<\/p>\n \u201cMoving back in?\u201d she asked quietly.<\/p>\n \u201cYes, lass.\u00a0 It\u2019s about time I stepped up and did my job.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cYou can do your job whilst living in a comfortable home, Brynjolf, but I won\u2019t argue with you if this is what you\u2019re determined to do.\u00a0 At least you can take the good bed with the screen if you insist on sleeping here, instead of using the old lumpy one.\u201d\u00a0 She paused and made a sympathetic face. \u201cShe didn\u2019t use it more than once or twice. It\u2019s almost pristine.\u201d<\/p>\n He paused and looked across the way at the bed Karliah had fancied up all that time ago.\u00a0 It did look a good deal more comfortable than the one his bones remembered none too fondly.<\/p>\n \u201cGood idea, lass.\u00a0 I think I will.\u00a0 Give me a moment and then I want you to come with me to talk to Delvin.\u201d\u00a0 He picked up his crate and made for the walkway.<\/p>\n \u201cI wouldn\u2019t get my hopes up if I were you, Brynjolf,\u201d she said quietly. \u201cHe\u2019s not going to take the job.\u201d<\/p>\n Brynjolf sighed.\u00a0 \u201cBlast.\u00a0 I had hoped, but\u2026 never mind.\u00a0 We still need to talk to him. I need to know where we stand and I want to make sure I know everything you know.\u201d He paused for a moment, then looked directly into her violet eyes. \u201cKarliah \u2013 will you know if she \u2026 if something happens with the Key?\u201d<\/p>\n She nodded, and dropped her voice even lower. \u201cI will. And so will you, Brynjolf. Trust me, it will be very clear to both of us if that happens.\u00a0 Thus far, she\u2019s done nothing to break her vow.\u201d<\/p>\n At least not that vow, anyway.<\/em><\/p>\n \u201cAll right then.\u201d<\/p>\n He dropped the crate onto the bed and then motioned for her to follow him into the Ragged Flagon.<\/p>\n Delvin Mallory looked up at him and smiled, or at least made the face that passed for a smile with him.\u00a0 \u201cGood to see you, boss.\u00a0 What can I do for you?\u201d<\/p>\n Brynjolf sighed.\u00a0 \u201cYou can stop calling me \u2018boss,\u2019 Delvin.\u00a0 We\u2019ve known each other too long for that.\u00a0 And besides that, I\u2019m going to ask you one more time if you will\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cNo, Bryn,\u201d Delvin said, shaking his head. \u201cWe\u2019ve been over this.\u00a0 It\u2019s your job.\u00a0 It\u2019s not my kind of thing.\u00a0 I\u2019m at my best working behind the scenes.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cEveryone in Tamriel knows you, Delvin,\u201d he grumbled.<\/p>\n Delvin grinned.\u00a0 \u201cLook, Bryn. I\u2019m too old to be a leader, and too many people in too many places know me for me to be a leader. I\u2019m of better use to you being your, um\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cJack of all trades?\u201d Brynjolf grinned.<\/p>\n \u201cAnd Master of none, and I\u2019d like to keep it that way, if you don\u2019t mind. I see you\u2019re wearing the Amulet.\u00a0 Stepping up? About time, if you ask me.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cYou need to give people time, Delvin,\u201d Karliah objected. \u201cNot everyone is made of cast iron the way you are.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cStahlrim, my pet. I\u2019m harder than cast iron.\u201d He smirked.<\/p>\n \u201cDelvin, you\u2019re hopeless,\u201d she groaned.<\/p>\n \u201cYes I am. And that doesn\u2019t answer the question. Bryn?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cWell someone has to do the damned job,\u201d he grumbled.\u00a0 \u201cLook, Delvin. \u00a0Here\u2019s how it is. \u00a0I\u2019m Second. \u00a0Still.\u00a0 We still have a Guildmaster, she\u2019s just not here.\u201d\u00a0 She\u2019s\u2026 just not here.<\/em>\u00a0 \u201cMaybe she\u2019ll come back, maybe she won\u2019t. But unless or until we make a decision to remove her,\u201d and I just can\u2019t bring myself to do it<\/em>, \u201cit looks like I\u2019m Acting Guildmaster again.\u00a0 I\u2019ve done it before and,\u201d he said with a sigh, \u201cas we all know, Maven likes me.\u201d<\/p>\n Karliah and Delvin looked at each other and nodded.<\/p>\n \u201cGood.\u00a0 That\u2019s good, Bryn. That\u2019s what I like to hear. I\u2019m sure Vex will agree when she gets back from her job. \u00a0Now then.\u00a0 Shall we fill you in on the latest? Pull up a chair.\u00a0 Have a drink.\u201d<\/p>\n Karliah smiled, nodded, and sat down. Brynjolf motioned to Vekel to bring him a flagon of mead, then sat down opposite Delvin.\u00a0 He wasn\u2019t concerned about having a drink, not any more. Roggi had gotten him well again, and he intended to stay that way.<\/p>\n ____<\/p>\n He\u2019d been wandering around the Guild for several hours and then settled down in the Flagon, falling back into old and comfortable routines, when the Ratway door opened behind him and a bright voice called \u201cVekel, I\u2019m positively parched!\u00a0 Have you got any of that lovely Cyrodilic brandy about, perhaps?\u201d<\/p>\n Vekel looked at Brynjolf and rolled his eyes.<\/p>\n \u201cYes, you know I keep some here just for you.\u00a0 Assuming you\u2019ve got the coin. I like you but there\u2019s still no handouts.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cWhen have I ever asked you for a handout, Vekel?\u201d<\/p>\n The man rounded the corner and moved across the floor to the bar, sliding any number of gold coins toward Vekel and taking his drink.\u00a0 \u201cThank you, dear,\u201d he said with a grin, then sipped the drink and turned, his eyes lighting up when he spied Brynjolf.<\/p>\n Yes, here I am, lad, come try to get me. You know you want to.<\/em>\u00a0 He waved the man over.<\/p>\n \u201cSave the dear for someone else, Andante,\u201d Vekel grumbled.\u00a0 \u201cI\u2019m not one of your pretty boys.\u201d<\/p>\n Andante was the name he used, and nobody had been able to get any other information out of him, not even Delvin or his network. He was an Imperial, with dark shoulder-length hair, a short beard, and blue eyes, quite handsome as far as Brynjolf was concerned.\u00a0 He was also showy, exuberant, and flamboyant, qualities that didn\u2019t usually go well in a field built on the bedrock of shadows and stealth. But Brynjolf had recruited him, not long before Dagnell left, because the boy had the most amazingly nimble fingers for pickpocketing that he\u2019d ever seen.\u00a0 And, he had to admit, the boy was nearly as smooth a talker as he was himself.<\/p>\n Besides, Delvin\u2019s contacts told him that the boy was also in the Dark Brotherhood, and was a rather accomplished assassin.\u00a0 He didn\u2019t condone needless killing while on Guild business but it was good to know that the boy was perfectly capable of holding his own in a pinch.<\/p>\n Boy. I have no idea how old the lad is but he\u2019s no boy. He\u2019s been around awhile. <\/em><\/p>\n \u201cHe most certainly isn\u2019t<\/em> one of my pretty boys,\u201d Andante whispered, smiling, as he slid into the chair opposite Brynjolf.\u00a0 \u201cYou, on the other hand\u2026.\u201d<\/p>\n Brynjolf snorted. He\u2019s smooth but sometimes he\u2019s absurd. He\u2019s been after me since the day I met him. <\/em>\u201cSave it, Andante.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cSo I hear you\u2019re back in charge. Very good.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cWord travels fast around here. Yes, and Delvin filled me in on the job you were doing for Vex. Did you get it done?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cOf course,\u201d Andante said, sliding a small felted bag across the table.<\/p>\n Brynjolf opened it to find several stunning rings, the ones Vex had sent Andante to remove from a wealthy mark in Solitude just a couple of days earlier.\u00a0 They would fetch a fine price, either whole or as gems and gold, and best of all their former owner was someone who\u2019d richly deserved to have them removed from her possession.\u00a0 He grinned. Sometimes the simplest things are the most satisfying.<\/em><\/p>\n \u201cWell done, lad.\u00a0 Here\u2019s your payment.\u201d\u00a0 He slid a sizable coin purse across the table in the opposite direction.<\/p>\n \u201cOh please don\u2019t \u2018lad,\u2019 me, Brynjolf,\u201d Andante whined. \u201cI know I\u2019m not the same vintage as you but it makes me feel like I\u2019m your son.\u00a0 And that would be perfectly creepy if, you know\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cDon\u2019t start with me, lad,\u201d Brynjolf grumbled.\u00a0 \u201cWe\u2019ve been through this before.\u201d<\/p>\n The boy is so persistent.\u00a0 Yes, he reminds me of Dynny. Yes, I\u2019m alone.\u00a0 No, I\u2019m not interested in taking him on right now.<\/em><\/p>\n Andante laughed. He had a bright, pleasing laugh that Brynjolf enjoyed hearing \u2013 when he was in the mood to hear a laugh.\u00a0 He wasn\u2019t convinced that this was such a moment.\u00a0 He still felt oddly conflicted about having moved out of Honeyside.<\/p>\n \u201cListen, Andante, you had very good timing. I\u2019ve got something for you.\u201d<\/p>\n Andante\u2019s blue eyes sparkled with mischief. He reached up and stroked his own short beard, feigning thoughtfulness.<\/p>\n \u201cDo you really?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cCut it out, lad. Right now. Enough.\u00a0 Understand?\u201d<\/p>\n Andante pouted.<\/p>\n You know, I see that pout. He plays it up so pretty.\u00a0 But I see steel underneath it, and something else that I haven\u2019t figured out yet.\u00a0 But I will.<\/em><\/p>\n He fished into his pocket and pulled out a key, pushing it across the table. \u201cHere.\u00a0 Take it.\u00a0 It\u2019s the key to Honeyside.\u00a0 I\u2019ve moved out, and I\u2019d rather see you in it than watch it get filled with cobwebs.\u201d\u00a0 And grunge.\u00a0 Shor\u2019s arse, why did I have to think about that? Turning the knife myself?\u00a0 <\/em><\/p>\n Andante\u2019s eyes widened, and he dropped all his pretenses.<\/p>\n \u201cSeriously? You\u2019re giving me Honeyside?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cI think it will suit your refined tastes, don\u2019t you?\u201d\u00a0 Look at that face. I\u2019ve completely surprised the lad. He forgets I\u2019ve been at this game a lot longer than he has.\u00a0 <\/em><\/p>\n \u201cWell yes, but\u2026\u201d\u00a0 Andante met his gaze, one side to the next and back, clearly trying to decide whether the offer had any strings attached.\u00a0 \u201cYou are serious, aren\u2019t you.\u00a0 Why are you moving out?\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cMoved. Past tense. It\u2019s done.\u00a0 I\u2019m tired of not getting any sleep.\u00a0 I missed the Cistern.\u201d<\/p>\n Andante laughed, a loud burst of amusement.\u00a0 \u201cRight.\u00a0 I\u2019ll buy that.\u201d\u00a0 He shook his head.\u00a0 \u201cWell I don\u2019t pretend to understand why this is happening, Brynjolf, but I am very grateful and I\u2019ll take you up on the offer.\u00a0 I\u2019ve been staying in that fishing shack just outside Honeyside and while it is better than a smelly mattress in a sewer\u2026.\u201d\u00a0 He pushed back his chair.<\/p>\n \u201cI know you have.\u00a0 I have good eyes, even for someone of my vintage.\u201d<\/p>\n \u201cThen you\u2019ll have caught some of my midnight dips in the lake?\u201d Andante gave him a mischievous smile.<\/p>\n \u201cYou swim in nothing more than your skin and you\u2019re fond of diving and mooning the world. Yes I\u2019ve seen you. You really are quite the exhibitionist.\u201d<\/p>\n Andante grinned at him, drained his brandy, waved, and made his usual grand exit from the room.<\/p>\n Brynjolf sighed and pushed himself out of the chair, then made his way to the bar.\u00a0 \u201cA mead, Vekel.\u00a0 That boy tires me out.\u201d\u00a0 He reached for his coin purse, only to have Vekel shake his head.<\/p>\n \u201cNo.\u00a0 On the house tonight, Bryn.\u00a0 It\u2019s good to have you back.\u201d<\/p>\n He rose out of the bath and dried himself off, walking nude through the warm basement of his home to the bedroom, where he had left his leathers on the bed. And frowned. There had been a time when just walking from the bath to the bedroom like that would have resulted in his spending … <\/p>\n![\"\"](\"https:\/\/baakay.com\/FanFic\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/03\/2-1-25-2.png\")
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<\/p>\nPart I: Dardeh<\/a><\/div>\nPrevious<\/a> \/ Next<\/a><\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"